In the month of January I decided that I wanted to try out the whole food detox, pseudo-paleo thing. I heard a lot of people that I personally know talk about how much they love it and how great it makes them feel so I figure it wouldn’t hurt to try and see if it did anything for some skin issues I have. I also took an alcohol break so it seemed right to combine all of the health stuff into one period of time. Naturally I turned to Goop for food inspiration.
Now if you don’t know what Goop is, congratulate yourself. You have managed to escape a bizarre form of simultaneous self-discovery and self-loathing that results from Goopdom. But let me enlighten you anyway. Goop is a set of lifestyle rules, products that you need to buy and food you need to eat in order to become Gwyneth Paltrow. However, it is generally understood that no mater how fully you submit yourself to the Goop culture, you will never actually become Gwyneth Paltrow. The end goal is unachievable because we all understand and respect that she is a goddess and we are lowly followers who just turn our zucchinis into noodles and apply snail juice to our faces. Such is life, but I digress.
So I did make Goop food and it was delicious and I stuck to my food plan for the large part of the month. The end result? Well, I felt mostly the same and am now back to eating the standard fare (typed at the precise moment my mouth is full of manchego cheese). I did not feel like a goddess like I was hoping to. I felt like myself, but that’s ok, that’s certainly better than not feeling like myself. I did, however, learn some great new recipes and more recently picked up a nightly ritual of drinking moon milk, which I actually think is having some health benefits. One of these recipes though is for chicken kimchi nori wraps and they really are a treat. They look like a giant sushi but one crossbred with an Asian inspired deli wrap. It’s filled with brown rice, a sesame-heavy greens mixture, chicken, and a good amount of nice spicy kimchi. Once you have all of the ingredients ready to go, the wrap takes shape really quickly and easily and I have no doubt that I’ll be bringing this dish back into the rotation soon even though the “detox” is over.
And I could end this post by saying something like, “So yes, this recipe did indeed prove yet again that everything that GP touches is gold, non-human that she is.” But that made me think of what she wrote on her Goop newsletter today (yes, I read it, stop laughing). She said, in response to the ridiculous/scary state that the world is in right now, “One common denominator though is that we all want goop to be a place for inclusion, fairness, and compassion, where we celebrate original thinkers and those who are striving for the upliftment of humanity…if we can find common ground, based on our common values, we can move the conversation from there, and create the world we all envision.” So although I disagree with her suggestions for heinously priced clothing and lifestyle choices, though agree with her holistic mindset, and will never in actuality live like Gwenyth Paltrow, she, like the rest of us, is human. A human who, like all humans, has feelings and thoughts, creativity and the right to equality. And although she has a lavish way of going about it, this is her way of creating something that is at least trying to bring some good into the world and to show women making a change, whether through compassion, through art, or through love. And as humans, that’s something we can all equally strive for. Funny how food and art can not only heal our bodies, but as a common ground, heal humanity, or at least try to. The fight continues, let us keep it going strong.
Chicken Kimchi Nori Wraps
Adapted from Goop
1 sheet of nori
½ cup cooked and cooled brown rice
toasted sesame seeds
1 scallion, sliced
a large handful of greens, chopped
soy sauce and sesame oil, to taste
¼ cup kimchi
3 oz sliced chicken
Combine the scallion and greens in a bowl and lightly dress with soy sauce and sesame oil. Mix together and set aside.
Place the nori on a flat surface and, using wet fingers, spread the cooked rice over the sheet of nori, leaving a 1-inch border at the top. Sprinkle sesame seeds over the rice and then add the greens mixture evenly overtop. Do the same with the kimchi. Add the sliced chicken in a row across the middle of the sheet of nori.
Use your fingers to wet the 1-inch top border of the nori with water. Then, carefully roll up the wrap and press on the wet end to get it to seal shut. Cut in half to serve.